Augmented Reality

I always had the idea that technology would eventually take us here, and to think beyond that is beyond me! I always think, “What will they come out with next?”

If you were to think of it in the perspective of an educator, where will you be in 20 years? What will technology be like then, and will it be just as easy to adapt to it as it is now? Will it always blow my mind? With these devices, what can the government control?

I have no idea what tomorrow brings, and I usually go with the flow, but this just takes to me to a whole other level.

What dreams may come… true?

Greetings blog world!

I forget how much I love to blog until I actually sit down and do it. I feel like I am always trying to reach for something, whether it’s a person, a place, a goal. Well my latest goal has a lot to do with my interests in people and traveling.

I have applied to be an International Coordinator for Aspect Foundation. http://www.aspectfoundation.org I found this website online and applied about a month back. I had my phone interview, my references were cleared, and after some training I will be ready to network and get the word out in my surrounding communities.

My passion behind it is simply that since I feel like I am suppose to be here, why not bring what I can to me and to my community. People should experience learning about a different culture first hand. I want to take and give the opportunity to myself and others. I believe in this we can create more open minded individuals and give the opportunity for someone to visit our country. There are so many other reasons to become a host family. I look forward to the day I get to be one.

So far there are three schools in my area that have unlimited space for foreign exchange students, and my school is one of them! That gave me a big sigh of relief, because this is the community I really want to affect and be a part of.

Now what? Where do I go from here? Can I find host families in this economically unstable era? I know not everyone is opened minded as me, but there HAS to be people that ARE as accepting and eager as me. If I exist, they exist. All in time. =]

Here is my host family and myself in Port-au-Prince, Haiti.

-Miss Miller

Turning Tables

Me: (Giving spelling test) “Number 2, completely. It is completely normal to like chocolate.”
Student: What was number 1?

Today was not even that challenging, yet more annoying and frustrating than anything else. I felt like the students managed the classroom in the worst way. My intention is to not bash the teacher I subbed for, especially since I am a rookie, but I got the impression that this teacher allows her students to take reign in the classroom and I have never experienced anything like that before. My head was literally throbbing when I left.

I must say that I think I handled it pretty well. For the first time I feel like I am not being too hard on myself, and for the first time I see the flip side. No, for real. Now I see what terrible classroom management leads to…. Of course I would second guess myself. Was it only crazy because there was a sub? because it is Friday? and is or was there a full moon!?

But then again, I feel so sure that the management isn’t properly maintained. I could sit here and tell you all the reasons why my day was not okay, or talk about all the great things that did happen, but I don’t feel like talking or thinking about it anymore.

There is one thing I would like to say as a final word. Those students that are so well behaved and actually want to learn are robbed from. Their time is stolen when I continually have to stop to redirect the students that either won’t listen or don’t care enough to do the work or are too busy talking. Those poor students have to suffer consequences due to other peoples actions and choices. This can be prevented with proper classroom management. I am not even a parent, but if I was, I would not want my child in that classroom. I would pull them out if I knew what the teacher didn’t provide for her students/my child. I am still shaking my head about it.

The tables have been turned and it was probably one of the best lessons I could have ever learned as an educator. My mind feels like it has been blown up, on a few different levels.

A nap is so necessary.
Much love,
Miss Miller

“discipline isn’t strong enough…”

This morning, a teacher and I were talking, and she started off by saying that she wanted to tell me something because I was wonderful. She said that some of the teachers don’t want me subbing in their classroom because my discipline isn’t strong enough. THAT right there struck a chord, not only because, wow, that sucks, but I had no idea. I asked her how many teachers and she said that didn’t matter. (Mind you, it is a small school) My heart got a little defensive, but I understand that she wants the best for me. I asked her how many teachers said this and she said it didn’t matter. Hmm… I do have assumptions.

To defend myself, I must say that discipline and what I like to call tough love is one of my main goals I work on every time I enter the building, which is evident with my recent posts. Not to mention I am a substitute teacher. It also showed me that one of my best strengths is critiquing myself. I always knew this, but she reassured me today, for sure.

If only she knew that I try so hard to be more firm with students every time I sub, and if she knew that I am doing everything in my power to be the best teacher. Plus I feel like it is more difficult when you are always changing classrooms. I will admit, discipline is probably one of my biggest weaknesses, and I am okay with it, because it is something I am constantly striving to better, and it is getting better, slowly. I know I keep blaming my heart, but it is, and I will learn when I have my own classroom what works for me and my students, and what doesn’t. It takes a lot of practice and time, and I am aware of this.

I haven’t been working so much, so I applied to work at another school where they are desperate for subs. Also, my other job with tutoring has been cancelled for the time being due to health issues with my client, and it is depressing. I haven’t been making much money, but I  do make enough to pay my bills. I also feel blessed because my family and friends are always treating me.

I grew up with a single mom and when we were struggling with finances, she would always say “Everything will work out”, and because of that,  I feel at ease when it comes to finances, and about life in general. Thanks, mom.

It’s… I don’t know what term to use, but at the end of the day, I brought my keys to the office and they asked me to work such and such days. Of course I do, and then she said that the teacher had requested certain subs, and I was on that list. I was quite surprised because I’ve never actually subbed for this teacher before.

images retrieved: http://kushsrivastava.com/tag/discipline/

More to come, and I’ve been thinking that I want to create some videos and share them with you. I just created a digital story on Haiti, and I hope to get that on here eventually. I just need to figure out how exactly. AND, I want to post song/dance videos… The Princess Pat, Five Little Monkeys, etc.

One day at a time, and just breathe. I must say, being a sub is probably one of the most difficult jobs I have ever had.

Help me reform this heart of mine!

image retrieved: http://spiritwomen.blogspot.com/2010/06/how-are-you-feeling.html

I had an emotional experience with a fifth grade student this past Friday. I care so much for this boy. He has a health condition and I won’t go into details, but he struggles physically, which most likely affects every area. He is a sweet boy and his peers love him regardless of his health conditions.

Well, my experience… heart breaking and embarrassing. First, I need to say that I hate wearing my heart on my sleeve, but I can’t help it. I can’t help that my heart is so emotionally affected by my feelings.

I was sitting at the desk, it was indoor recess, and there is a bean shaped table next to the desk where a couple of boys are playing with blocks, stacking them to create buildings, and not interested in sharing. Maybe it was competition with the other boys, maybe it is stress and pain building up inside, but the boy I speak of said an inappropriate word, and I said that wasn’t acceptable, and then he said ‘piss off.’ I told him he had to leave the classroom, and he did while creating a scene and yelling piss off three times, and then slammed the door.

I went out to ask if he needed to talk, but he said he needed to go for a walk. I was upset because I could obviously feel that he was angry and there was something wrong. This isn’t his normal behavior. He has a big heart, and he was obviously struggling with something.

Well, as he took his walk, I immediately went to his teacher, and told her what happened, and by now, I feel really bad and sad about this whole thing, and I start crying while I am explaining it to her. I wish I could have controlled my tears at that moment, but because I am so totally in tune with my emotions, it was difficult. And then I got embarrassed that my students would see that I was crying, so then I kept crying. I must have looked like a fool, and I really hope that they didn’t see some teacher that can’t control her tears. I hope they saw a caring individual in me, and the same applies for the adults. My goodness, for real Miss Miller?

I wonder if there is anyone is the world that is exactly like me in this aspect. Do they feel and project what their emotions all the time? I know that I have such a BIG heart, but I wish I could shrink it a little, because it’s too much to handle at times.

Love, Miss Miller

Tough love

Oh this tough love thing is a challenge for such a sappy happy friendly girl like me.

image retrieved: http://upall.co/tough-love-735.php

I have no children, although I have been around children my whole life. I guess I’ve never had to really discipline so much. I’ve never had MY OWN classroom to experience that. But here is my latest lesson on being an educator.

I met with a teacher the other day, to talk about some things I felt that I needed to work on as an educator, and she gave me the necessary feedback that I needed to hear.

Basically, I realized that I am the nice teacher that students walk all over.  Let’s be honest,  it’s mostly because of my personality. I take after my mother, a soft heart and usually can’t say no. : ) It’s not that I’m not an effective teacher. I have all the skills and knowledge, but also the characteritic to BE a great professional educator. I must say that today was such an important day for me, like a mini milestone.

I taught fifth grade full day, and man oh man, the discipline I had to do. I did my best to apply positive reinforcement, but I also had to follow through with consequences, and it really isn’t as terrible as I thought. Keep in mind, it is Friday, and a lot of the students took several bathroom and drink breaks. I’m working on it!!! The best part was, we got all of the work done, it wasn’t so chatty and chaotic, and I could tell that student were grasping what ‘we’ were learning. I say we because I feel like I am in fifth grade all over again, just more advanced and experienced. A lot of the content was a refresher for me, and I enjoyed that.

Because I feel like I am rambling, I want to finish with this. I will never again allow myself to be the teacher that students can walk all over. It is okay to be strict, and students will not resent or hate you for it. The most important thing I’ve learned, thanks to my new mentor and my latest experiences, is that you need to be and act like a serious professional, even if you aren’t that experienced. Without respect from the students, your classroom cannot be managed, which translates to students not getting the knowledge that they need and should get.

It’s been real, but it’s about to get serious, and I am excited to keep applying this new insight and reality.

Much love. Miss Miller

Check out this tough love action going on between a mama bear and her cub!

Stuck in a rut attitude

I understand why some people say they hate winter. I get it, the snow, the driving in the snow, the cold weather, the colds and flus, and lack of vitamin d. Some call it the  winter blues, but I’d like to think I’m stuck.

I’ve been stuck in a rut physically, mentally and emotionally. When will I be free?

image retrieved: clubdinein.com

Do you see yellow flower trying to burst out with color?!? Yeah, I’m the one blocking her way. Winter just started but it feels like it has been longer, which I think is a normal feeling. I have so much time on my hands, and with being sick every other week, I spend a lot of my time at home. It gets dark quick, and I can tell my moods are trying to adjust.

However, the girl I tutor for called and spring semester starts on MONDAY!!! Which means my days will be more occupied with actual challenging mental work. I look forward to it because the girl I tutor teaches me so much about myself, but I find that my patience sometimes get short with her. This semester I will be more focused on the fact that not only do I get to live platonically and go to college for free through tutoring (sixth year straight!), but I get to earn money while helping out another student. I know the months will go by quick, and before you know it, it is May yet again.

When it is May, I will be a yellow flower bursting with joy and sunshine. I love that side of me. I feel contagious and energized.

As for now, yeah, I guess I could curl up, hibernate, and wait for the sun to shine, OR I could motivate myself. It honestly depends on the day.

Much love. Miss Miller